Dear Malcolm

Dear Malcolm,





You left this world two weeks ago. Sometimes I wonder if my mind has really registered that this really happened to us.





I'm angry.





I'm sad.





I'm tired.





Sometimes I'm worried that I'm not sad enough but then sometimes it overwhelms me.





I'm worried for my family. I know Holly is sad but it's more of a silent sadness. Mom and Heath can't hide it. It's so visible in their eyes that's it's all I can see when I look at them. I can literally feel their broken hearts.





As for me, I have to say I have some regrets where you and I are concerned. I can't believe I'm writing this but I feel there are some things I need to say. On certain occasions I know I shared with you how I felt about you.





Did you really hear me?





Did you really know how I felt?





Before you died, you told Mom that you wanted to call all of us kids and let us know you loved us. She said 'they know that' and you said 'Shayla doesn't.' To hear that was quite a blow.


I need to say this, before God and everyone, I knew from the very beginning that you loved me!





You met my Mom after she'd had some really hard times. Some things are meant to be, and you and her were definitely meant to be. I remember those early days of travelling to Walsh to visit you on the farm. I just thought you were so cool! You had a three-wheeler, horses, cattle. I loved working the cattle.





After you and Mom married I discovered I wasn't much into the farming part of farming and ranching. I also discovered I wasn't much on someone other than my Mom telling me what to do. But you took on the role of father to us and you demanded respect. You also demanded that we respect our Mother. Lessons learned.





At that point in my life, my love was rodeo. A hard week of work on the farm was paid off on the weekend with a barrel racing jackpot or a rodeo. You made sure we each had a reliable horse as well as a pick-up and trailer to travel in.





You and I butted heads sometimes. I was used to it being me, Mom and Holly. I was stubborn and strong willed. I guess you were, too because you didn't give up on me.





I called you when Annette died and I told you what you meant to me. I hope you remember that conversation.





I never called you Dad but I hope you know I considered you my Dad. I just never felt right about taking that title away from my own father. My parents divorced when I was fairly young but I've always had a good relationship with my Dad. He has always been and always will be a part of my life. My Mom never spoke negatively about him to Holly or I. I just feel so lucky that I am able to say I had two wonderful fathers when most people are fortunate to just have one.





The selfish part of me is feeling a bit cheated right now. You're not going to be there when Danny and I get married and have kids. You're not going to be there for the birth of Heath and Amy's child. You're not going to live in Oklahoma like we planned.





I am thankful you got to know your first grandchild Olivia. Just this weekend, Mom asked her if she was Mimi's girl and she replied, 'Papa's peanut.' Beautiful and heart wrenching all at the same time.





When I headed out for the hospital in Amarillo two weeks ago I thought in a couple of days I'd be returning home. Never in my wildest dreams would I have ever imagined that that we'd be having your funeral the next week.





It's not fair.





It wasn't supposed to end like this.





We miss you.





I hope you know how much I loved you and appreciated all you did for me.





Even if I didn't always show it, I had the utmost respect for you.





Rest in peace Malcolm.





Love,


Shayla

I heart New York.

“One belongs to New York instantly, one belongs to it as much in five minutes as in five years” ~ Thomas Wolfe

At the time of my last blog, Danny and I were about to embark on our adventure in New York City. Well, here it is January and I'm just now getting around to an update!

As I feared would happen, I fell in love with NYC! I dreaded leaving. I instantly longed to go back. I dream about her still. I think I may need to see a doctor.
;-)

After coming home, I was particularly struck by the above quote by Thomas Wolfe. Many paint New York as a cold and uncaring city. I didn't see it that way at all.
The city streets hum with an energy you can feel night and day. Except for a few rude cab drivers the people were friendly and helpful. As I stood in the shadows of her skyscrapers, I still couldn't believe I was really there. You see these images on TV and in books and movies, yet here you are seeing them with your own eyes! It was a trip I'll never forget and I can't wait to go back!

Here's a few pictures I took in the city. Thanks to my sister Holly for helping with the editing process!



After checking into our hotel, we set out on foot to see the Brooklyn Bridge. It's one of the oldest suspension bridges in the US. Construction on the bridge began on January 3, 1870 and it opened for use on May 24, 1883. It spans the East River connecting the boroughs of Manhattan and Brooklyn.





Looking back towards Manhattan from the Brooklyn Bridge you can see the Statue of Liberty.



I love this picture of the Manhattan Bridge because you can see the Empire State Building and the Chrysler Building in the background! Obviously, that's the Empire State Building there in the center. Off to the right you'll see the Chrysler Building. The Manhattan is also a beautiful bridge in her own right.



On my my favorite pictures from the weekend. This is the Brooklyn Bridge at night as seen from the South Street Seaport. Absolutely stunning!



You gotta get some pizza at Grimaldi's in Brooklyn! Pies are baked in a coal-fired brick oven. They were chosen as one of the five best pizzerias in the US by the Food Network. Long, long lines to get in but worth the wait!



As you can tell, Danny enjoyed it!



Ah Central Park! I wish we had devoted an entire day to the park. It was absolutely beautiful. We took a pedi-cab tour of the park and learned a lot. The above picture is the twin towers of the San Remo building on Central Park West as seen from Central Park.


This is The Boathouse on Central Park Lake. Sex and the City fans might recognize this as the place where Carrie met Big for lunch......and an unintentional swim!



Obviously a stop at Strawberry Fields is a must for all Beatles fans. The Imagine memorial is quite moving.



Another important site for Beatles fans is the Dakota Building on 72nd Street and Central Park West. Built between 1880 and 1884, it is believed to have been given it's name because the upper west side of Manhattan seemed, at that time, to be as remote as the Dakota Territory.



The Dakota is most famous for being the site of John Lennon's murder on December 8, 1980. The Lennon's had spent several hours at The Recording Plant before returning home to the Dakota around 10:50pm. He was shot by Mark David Chapman, a "fan" to whom Lennon had given an autograph to earlier in the day. Lennon staggered up five steps just inside the doorway of the Dakota and collapsed. John Lennon was pronounced dead on arrival at Roosevelt Hospital emergency room at 11:15pm.



One of many open markets in Chinatown.



Well, I hope you've enjoyed the pictures. These are just a few. I took hundreds and could have taken hundreds more! If you ever get the chance to visit New York City I highly, highly recommend it! In fact, if you paid my way, I'd be more than willing to tag along with you! ;-)

I LOVE NEW YORK!!!!!!

Cheers!
Shayla

Gonna take a bite out of the Big Apple!

Well, it's finally here.

The week I've been waiting for! Danny and I are going to New York City Thursday morning! I'm so very, very excited for this trip!!

During hurricane season, Danny drove to Long Island for a hurricane that never really hit. They basically drove to the tip of Long Island then turned around and drove back home. Unbeknownst to me, he did some snooping around while he was there and shortly there after I received an email from AAA Travel letting me know we were going to the Big Apple!!

My Danny is full of surprises. :-)

For many years now I've wanted to visit NYC. Being a long time Billy Joel fan, I long to see all the places he sings about.

And this may sound a bit silly, but after watching every episode and both Sex and the City movies, I want to soak up the sights I've seen through the eyes of Carrie, Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte!

Danny is making this dream come true for me this week!

We're staying at the Millennium Hilton right across the street from the World Trade Center site. I've been reading a lot about New York trying to figure out the best was to see all I want to see in the most efficient manner. I think we've come to the conclusion that it may be best to just take off walking and see what we see!

Last week my Reckless Kelly newsletter arrived in my inbox. To my surprise, I discovered they are playing at Terminal 5, an NYC club, the night we arrive! I went to the club's website and much to my surprise Robert Earl Keen is the show's headliner!!! Those who know me know I LOVE REK. I have seen him many, many different times in many different locations. Words can't describe the feeling of knowing I'm going to witness him playing a show in New York City!!! Plus, this is Danny's first REK show!

Wow, what a memory this is going to be! Hurry up Thursday!!!!

Cheers!
Shayla

Silly Val!

Meet Val. This is Danny's dog. We brought her down from Kellyville to live with us. She's a funny gal!

Yesterday Danny installed a pet door for my little rat terrier Tai. She really enjoys digging out of the backyard and running around Chickasha. This, in turn, throws me into a tizzy until I find her and get her back home! Somedays I'm so aggravated when she gets out that I'm tempted to let her go but in the end I'm all talk. After 11 years I just can't stand the thought of losing her. Anyway, we decided that if she wasn't forced to stay in the backyard and could come and go as she pleased, she might be less likely to dig out of the yard.

Once Danny got the pet door installed, I was watching Tai go in and out. Suddenly a big black snout poked through the pet door. I told Danny that Val would probably try and shove her big noggin through the pet door.

This morning when I went and peeked into the laundry room to see if Tai was in or out I saw Val's collar on the floor! Just as I predicted, at some time in the night she poked her head through the pet door!

We both got a good laugh out of that one! These darn animals drive me nuts most of the time, but I can't imagine life without them! Hope your animal kingdom is as entertaining as ours!

Cheers!
Shayla

Help?

I know, I know! It's been over a month since my last blog! But that last one was pretty good don't ya think? :-)

Danny and I have been staying busy. It's seems there's just not enough hours in the day to get everything accomplished! That's what I shall blame my lack of blogging on!

My annual birthday cook-out was a success again this year! We had a great time with family and friends. Danny made my birthday a memorable one as I expected he would! I had three days worth of scavenger hunts I had to complete to get my birthday gifts! Isn't he creative? Day one was a Starbucks gift card and a gift certificate for a pedicure, day two was a PowerMat phone charger and the big gift on day three was a Canon EOS Rebel digital camera!!! Yes, I'm spoiled and it's all Danny's fault!!

Now on to the important stuff! I need your help. As you know, I am a Scentsy consultant and this month our director has given us some incentive. If we sell $500 in product we get a set of the mini-testers! If you're able to this month, placing an order would help me in reaching my goal! My friend Bonny is having a book party so you'd also be helping her out by placing the order under her party. It's really easy! Just go to my website (www.shaylasanders.scentsy.us). On the left side of the website you'll see "Bonny's Basket Party." If you'll click "Buy from party" it will count for her basket party. Then just place your order and it will be shipped right to your door! How easy, right? Check out the "Bring Back My Bar" promotion. Scentsy took a poll and brought back the top discontinued bars. This includes the ever-popular LEATHER!!!! They are only available through the end of July! Thanks for your help friends!!

Cheers!
Shayla

A love story.

OK.

So it's been awhile since I posted a blog.

I'd like to tell you I've been doing lots of creative projects like songwriting. Or scrapbooking. Or photography. Or maybe even home improvement projects.

But the truth is it's a boys fault. His name is Danny and I'm so happy my blogging(amoungst other things)has suffered because of him!

My blogging isn't the only thing I've fallen behind on since falling in love. You should see the backlog of TV shows on my DVR! My Scentsy business has taken a nosedive. I've just recently gotten back around to cleaning the damn house! I can say, it's all been worth it!

Now I've been holding down the fort as a single gal for almost 35 years now. I know, I know - it's hard to believe that a chick so proficient in drinking, swearing, insulting and pretty much just being a smart ass in gereral, hasn't been snatched off the market yet. Believe it.

It was February 19th, 2010. Approximately 10:30pm. The Silver Spur Bar just south of Chickasha. In my defense, I hadn't been out to the Spur in years so don't judge me.

Ok fine. On this particular evening, my night out started at the Wan Dora in Chickasha. Now you can judge me.

Anyway, a few days earlier, while having mid-week cocktails at the above-mentioned Wan Dora, I met a young fella named Dylan. He sort of looked like a young version of my friend Misti's husband Nathan. Now we all know Nathan turned out to be the greatest husband ever so I was hoping. I gave him my digits and he called me on February 19th. We met up at the Wan Dora and had a few beers. He said some friends of his were out at the Spur and I agreed to roll out there with him. On the way out I asked him how old he was. He told me he was 25. GASP!!!!!!!! I knew this would not be working out.

We get to the Spur and he proceeds to leave me standing in the middle of the bar while he is chatting up his friends in the parking lot. I decide, to hell with this I'll have a seat at the bar and drink a coldie by myself. And then there was Danny. He was sitting on the stool to my left and turned around and I thought, "what a handsome little Mexican this is!" Now remember up above when I mentioned what a smart ass I am? Danny is, in fact, NOT Mexican. I just love to give him shit. I'm really just kidding, that wasn't my first thought. I don't really remember what my first thought was, I just remember we hit it off immediately.
We danced the night away and our fate was sealed.

Now I'm not gonna sit here and say the circumstances in which we met were perfect but I really do believe we were meant for each other and Danny would tell you the same thing.

I've been in a few serious relationships over the years and at one time I really thought I'd found the love of my life. I was wrong.

After being single for so long I kept telling myself that when I met the right person I would just KNOW it. It would be a different feeling than what I'd felt before. I was right.

As most couples know, it's not always rosy and I can attest to that now. Just the simple act of co-habitating with someone can be a challenge at times, especially if you've lived alone as long as I have. I like things a certain way: my way. Just kidding but there really are some things that are a pain in the ass. Danny being, quite possibly, the worlds worst driver being one of them. He prefers to lisen to his precious GPS instead of his precious Shayla. When it turns out I'm right, he has no choice but to listen to me in all my smart ass glory! Also, the mountains of laundry I now do! Sheesh! I used to do laundry for myself once a week! This is a dirty boy I'm dealing with here folks. A dirty boy who has yet to grasp the concept of recycling towels. I use a towel, hang it up to dry and re-use it again for a few days. Not my Danny. I shall be working on getting him trained.

All jokes aside, he is probably the kindest man I've ever met. I never have to wonder if he loves me or not. He would honestly do anything in the world for me and I would do the same for him. Plus, he puts up with my sassy ass. Now you all know that's A LOT deal with right there!!

I find it funny that we met the weekend after Tracey and I had a girls weekend in Fort Worth to celebrate our single gal selves. I guess you really do find love when you least expect it! I'm glad I've found mine.

Cheers!
Shayla

Happy birthday Nana.

Today you would have been 74 years young. I still can't believe you've been gone for two years.

I'm gonna go to happy hour today and celebrate your birthday with my friends.

Some folks may say that's tacky but I know you would have loved it!

Cheers Fay!!!!!